WHY WEIGHING YOURSELF FEEDS YOUR FOOD OBSESSION

Recently, I've received messages asking my opinions on scales and weighing ourselves. Since this is also a hot topic with some of my clients, I figured it deserved a blog post.

When we are obsessed with being a certain weight, we are going to be obsessed with food. The two do not each occur in a vacuum. The two feed off each other. Our obsession with food increases every time we step on the scale.

The problem with scales is that they have judgment built right into them.

We only get on a scale to see "how we are doing." Check the impact of sushi with the girls and nachos with our man.

Instead of allowing ourselves to fully enjoy these moments in our lives, we have to just check in with a weigh-in that almost certainly leads to self-sabotaging thoughts because we were “bad."

The most common reason I hear from others for using the scale is that it is a self-motivating tool to “get back on the wagon” when you have fallen off.

And the scale does not hold you accountable. If that argument truly worked, you would look like Jack from The Nightmare Before Christmas by now and this wouldn't still be an issue.

Stop making the scale so powerful.

I’d like to nip that “weighing myself is the catalyst for better choices” argument right in the bud.

It does not work. All it does is perpetuate the cycle of negative self-talk, food rules, and restriction, and thus more yo-yo dieting, binge eating, and emotional eating.

When we weigh ourselves, we give food and the scale power over us.

Instead of eating based on how we are feeling, we eat based on the number. This interferes with our ability to eat intuitively and listen to our bodies. Plus our weight can fluctuate daily from the minutiae of everyday life like eating, drinking, urinating, having a bowel movement, and exercise.

Weighing ourselves literally just makes us feel crappy about our behavior and our body. We don't need to get on the scale to know if we've been making poor eating choices. We can course correct without stepping a foot on it.

Judging ourselves based on the size of our body or a number we have no freedom. We are in a food prison where food has the power to dictate our actions, emotions, and sense of well-being. Food determines if we have been good or bad.

Our obsession with and feeling controlled by food is exacerbated by weighing ourselves.

It literally serves no purpose and only holds you back from healing your relationship with food and your body.

If you are having a problem not getting on a scale, the scale is not holding you accountable. It's holding you hostage.

Instead of checking your weight in the morning, check-in and see how you are feeling. Are you energized, and positive? How do your clothes feel, are you excited to take on the day and do the things you love?

How you feel is so much more important than a number. Honestly, f*ck the number.

please ditch the scale.

xo

C

Binge Eating Recovery Resources

• To learn more about the non-diet approach to healing your relationship with food, check out my free video training series HERE.

• You can also check out my podcast, Love Your Bod Pod, on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen to podcasts.

• Lastly, you can also check out my books, or online course.

STRUGGLING WITH FOOD GUILT & BAD BODY IMAGE? READ & WATCH THIS.

Those of you who have struggled with your relationship with food are probably no stranger to the feelings of guilt that can come when you eat something you said you weren't going to eat.

What you might be less aware of is the impact that can have on body image. This post explains the connection between the two, and what to do about it. You can always watch this video if you prefer that to reading.

Just the other day, I was voice-memo-ing back and forth with one of my private 1:1 clients because she was having a bad body image day.

While there are several components to improving your body image, a component is to identify your triggers. It’s common to one day be totally fine with how you look and the next day feel like crap. So what gives?

Retracing your steps in the hours, days, and even weeka leading up to the bad body image day(s) will help you work through it to the other side and be more equipped to take care of yourself the next time a triggering situation happens.

I asked my client to retrace her steps.

She mentioned that the night before she ate really late, which historically, she has tried not to due during her dieting days (ugh Intermittent Fasting!) and was feeling really guilty about it. She believes she needs to stay thin or get thinner and fears that eating late at night will lead to weight gain.

Bingo. Food guilt. That was her trigger this time.

She woke up with bad body image because of eating late the night before triggering anxiety around her body.

Guilt, by definition, is a feeling of having done wrong or failed in an obligation.

In this "messed up with food" scenario, you believe you did something wrong with food, and in order to do something wrong with food, there has to be an underlying belief about what is the right thing to do with food.

And we only ever have a right and wrong way to eat if we have food rules.

So the way to eliminate food guilt, and the negative body image it can trigger, is to eliminate food rules.

Food rules are something you learn from Diet Culture or you can come up with on your own, in response to having anxiety around food and your body.

For example, You are told sugar is bad and will ruin your health which makes you fearful and anxious around sugar, so to manage the fear and anxiety you might make a rule to not eat sugar or only eat small amounts.

Or, you feel insecure and anxious about the size of your body, and you hear that intermittent fasting can help you lose weight, so you make a rule to only eat during a specific window of time during the day to help manage the insecurity and anxiety around your body.

Insert some of your food rules here:________________

As a result, you temporarily feel less anxious as you follow the rules but the problem with food rules is that you almost always break them eventually. They are unsustainable throughout the unfolding of our lives.

When you break them, you feel guilty, because you think you did something wrong and failed an obligation.

This leads to the original anxiety coming back because of what it might do to your body. You try to manage the uncomfortable feelings by trying to make up for it and by promising to stick to the rules even harder next time.

And the cycle just continues.

anxious about food/body -> makes food rule -> temporary decrease in anxiety -> breaks rule, feels guilty -> anxious about food/body -> makes food rule -> temporary decrease in anxiety -> breaks rule, feels guilty and on and on and on.

To break the cycle you have to eliminate the rules by first identifying the rule, giving yourselves permission to break it and doing so without trying to "make up for it" like you have in the past.

By not going back to rules, over exercising, or restricting, you are breaking the cycle.

This of course means you will have to deal with the fear, guilt and anxiety that arises after breaking the rule without "making up for it" in the ways you typically do. This will be uncomfortable.

Move through the discomfort with your mind and our heart. You will have to talk yourself through it by tapping into both.

Mind: Using rational, intellectual thought, what do you know to be true?

Heart: What you are committed to, why do you want to be free from your food rules? Food rules are restrictive and contracting, so what would feel expansive and freeing?

Lets go through the intermittent fasting example from my client:

Mind says: I know that eating past 6 pm is okay, humans do it all the time. And if I am hungry past 6 pm, honoring my hunger is listening to my body and taking care of it. Not honoring my physical hunger is starving myself and that is a disordered eating behavior. Intermittent Fasting, outside of a select medical situations in which a doctor is supervising the fasting as a medical intervention, it is not only totally unnecessary but a slippery slope into an eating disorder.

Heart says: I want to honor my body in every way, and by doing, so I honor myself. I want to go out to eat dinner with family and friends and not fear what time is but rather be present and enjoy my life fully. I am committed to having unconditional permission so eating is easy.

Then you have to repeatedly break your food rule, without "making up for it", and work through the guilt and other uncomfortable emotions by checking in with your mind and heart.

With repetition and time the rule will dissolve and so will the guilt and negative body image it triggers.

VIBRANT FALAFEL BOWLS W/ COCONUT QUNIOA, SWEET TAHINI & PICKLED VEGGIES

JUMP TO RECIPE

The other week, I was craving falafels, and typically, when I order them out, they come with cucumbers and tomatoes. Two ingredients I love, but my partner hates. So when I decided to make them at home, I knew I was going to have to think outside the box and come up with some other combination of ingredients that would still bring that delicious balance of flavors - brightness, acidity, crunch. That's how I landed on pickled radishes and carrots. I wasn't sure how my partner would feel about this bowl, but to my surprise, he really liked it. The acidity is balanced out by the creamy coconut quinoa and sweet tahini sauce. It really does hit all the right notes.

This is a recipe for 2. Double it up if you want leftovers or are making it for more people. Typically, I like to have leftovers, so I have something quick to eat the next day for lunch, but since I am almost always cooking food for two people, sometimes I end up with recipes just for two. Oh well.

This bowl features:

Store-bought frozen falafels - to cut down on overall prep time. We used Trader Joe's.

Coconut Quinoa - I used half water and half coconut cream to make this. You're left with a slightly sweet and super creamy grain that really balances out the pickles.

Quick pickled radishes and carrots - I use half apple cider vinegar, half hot water, and a generous pinch of salt to make these. Make them first, and they are ready by the time you finish everything else.

Cabbage salad - This salad is super simple and quick. Just shredded cabbage, apple cider vinegar, olive oil, green onion, salt, and pepper.

Avocado - Do I need to say much? I add avocado to most of my bowls. It's just delicious and beautiful.

Sweet Tahini - I am obsessed with tahini and use it often. Today, I made the dressing sweet and bright to balance out the pickles and tie the whole dish together. So good.

Garnish- mint, clover, and broccoli sprouts, sesame seeds.

Vibrant Falafel bowl w/ sweet tahini & pickled veggies

Serves 2

PICKLED VEGGIES:

• 1 cup shredded carrots

• 1 cup sliced radish

• 2 cups apple cider vinegar, divided

• 2 cups hot water, more as needed

• Salt

• 4 Peppercorns, optional

• 2 springs mint, optional

COCONUT QUINOA:

• 1 cup quinoa, rinsed

• 5.4 fl oz coconut cream

• 1 1/3 cup + 2 tbsp water

• Salt

CABBAGE

• 1/3 large head of cabbage, shredded

• 2-3 green onions, sliced

• 1/4 cup apple cider vinegar

• 1/2 cup olive oil

• S&P

SWEET TAHINI

• 1/2 cup tahini

• 1/4 cup hot water

• 1-2 tbsp maple syrup

• 1 clove garlic, grated or pressed

• 1 lemon, juiced

• S&P

BOWL:

• Frozen store-bought falafels (we used Trader Joe’s)

• Avocado, sliced

OPTIONAL GARNISH:

• Clover or broccoli sprouts

• Sesame seeds

• Pickles jalapeño

• Fresh mint

DIRECTIONS:

PICKLES: add the carrots and radishes to separate bowls. Add half the apple cider vinegar and hot water to each bowl. If needed, add a little more water to make sure the vegetables are fully submerged. Add a spring of mint to the carrots with a generous pinch of salt and set aside. Add some peppercorns & a generous salt to the radish and set aside.

COCONUT QUINOA: add the quinoa, coconut cream, water, and salt to a pot. Bring to a boil, lower to a simmer, and occasionally stir uncovered until all liquid is absorbed. Cover, remove from heat, and let finish in its own steam.

CABBAGE SALAD: add everything to a bowl, mix well, set aside.

SWEET TAHINI: add everything to a bowl, mix well, set aside.

FALAFELS: Cook falafels according to package instructions

BOWL ASSEMBLY: layer each bowl with quinoa, cabbage, carrots, radish, falafels, avocado, tahini sauce and desired garnishes. Enjoy!